• Don’t be “That” Dominant When You Log In

    As awful as it is and as much as I wish it weren’t true, the BDSM community does include a handful of very, very shady individuals. We’ve all had it happen, have seen it happen, or know someone it’s happened to: that lecherous creep who makes unwanted advances or...
  • Last Minute Gifts

    Somehow, the holidays are already here. Whatever you celebrate, if anything, maybe it snuck up on you too and now you’re scrambling to think of what to buy. Well, I’m here to give you a few helpful hints for the friends and loved ones you still need to buy...
  • You’re Using A Wooden Spoon For What? An Interview With Domestic Discipline Author Anastasia Vitsky

    In recent years, the lifestyle most commonly known as “domestic discipline” has experienced a surge in popularity, with sites springing up online to discuss this relationship. Unfortunately, most resources for this type of relationship are overwhelmingly based in heterosexual relationships or are deeply mired in a Christian “head-of-the-household” mindset....
  • Review: She Who Must Be Obeyed

    Greetings, Kittens! Here we are with a different type of review, a BDSM anthology called She Who Must Be Obeyed, edited by D. L. King.  The summary reads as follows: Award-winning erotica editor D.L. King’s new lesbian anthology showcases dominant femmes and their submissive partners playing out vivid and...
  • Representation Done Right

    I’ve previously discussed how difficult it can be to find an accurate representation of BDSM in pop culture. Unfortunately, the most mainstream thing we in the kink community have to “represent” us is Fifty Shades of Grey.  I don’t think I have to clarify why that’s terrible.  So, when...
  • Venturing Into Anal

    For some reason, when it comes to anal sex, women are assumed to be completely uninterested. Even women who do like it feel embarrassed coming forward and admitting they willingly have anal. It’s worse when their friends might make comments along the lines of “thank god (s)he’s never tried...
  • Between The Sheets: In Favor Of Drawn Porn

    For some reason, there is a large overlap in the population of kinksters and nerds, which means the two alternative communities, though separate in scope and interest, tend to have a lot in common regardless. At the intersection of kinkiness and nerdiness is one of the most treasured aspects...
  • Experience: Toys and the Binary

    In order to observe the limiting and binary gender separation of toys, pretty much any toy store will do. Upon arrival, everything may not be immediately noticeable about how the gendered items are organized throughout the store, but soon enough, the separation and assumptions about gender gradually get more...
  • A Different Kind of Aftercare

    When people within the BDSM community hear aftercare, the first thought is of a Dom(me) carefully taking care of their submissive. They might fetch a glass of water, place a tender kiss on spots that might be a bit sore, light a cigarette for their partner to enjoy, or...